Since I posted my essay, I've been feeling a bit at a loose end and vaguely irritable.
I'm not sure what I should be concentrating on.
So I am going to bake a cake. Not any old cake, mind. A Dobos Torte, named after Austrian pastry chef Josef Dobos, who created it. The Buckwell has been going on about Dobos Tortes since I met him, and earlier this year I tasted one at a Hungarian restaurant. Indeed, it was mightily tasty. I went home and looked up a recipe, only to reel back in horror when I read that every slice contained around 1250 calories, more than half the daily recommended amount for a chick/sheila/bird/laydee.
According to most recipes, it should take me around 1 hour and 30 minutes to bake and ice, although I think it will take more like 2, as there are 9 eggs to beat, and I only have a hand whisk. Yes, this is truly going to be challenging.
The other criteria is that I will need to bake it for guests, because there's no way that the Buckwell and I are going to eat an entire cake in 3 days (which is how long it will keep for because of the chocolate buttercream). Especially 4 slices at 1250 cals each.
It will not be a life-changing mission, but it will be a delicious one.
Friday, 28 September 2007
Thursday, 27 September 2007
Mission update - Gone and forgotten
I am exhausted and relieved. My final essay for my last paper of my OU degree is done. It is not a very good one, but it should do the job. In a short while I am off to the Crawley post office to queue for a long while, where it will be posted off in a strangely anti-climatic way. Then I will go to Greggs, that bastion of cheap, basic and unhealthy lunches, where I will eat a greasy, peppery vegetable pasty (vegies consisting of potato and peas, for those interested). I've just been to the Greggs site as a matter of fact, my interest piqued by writing about it. On their (poorly written and cumbersome) site, they state: 'We would like to thank you for visiting and if you are a customer, for your tremendous loyalty and support.' This baffles me. It sounds like something terribly bad has happened and they are almost surprised that people are continuing to buy from them. Have I missed something? Anyway, this web banner would seem to indicate that they do regard their customers as passionate people (but not passionate about good food, just cheap food), so maybe their customers' loyalty and support is indeed 'tremendous'. Passionate about pasties? Not theirs, that's for sure. Although 'feed your apathy' doesn't have quite the same ring to it, does it?
On another completed unrelated note, I have been slightly disappointed to discover that my workplace is about to ban internet sites not feasibly related to work. I know this means Facebook, so therefore there go my Scrabulous games (which increase my wordpower and creativity, thus my ability to write good copy). Boo. I also suspect that access to blogspot will be restricted, so bye bye lunchtime updates and the positive feeling engendered by embarking on a mission. Boo.
Apparently there has been 'widespread abuse of the internet lately', hence the militant crackdown. But for people like me, who really don't have enough to do every day anyway, and rely on frivolous sites to keep me sane and thus productive, I fear the decision may be the beginning of my descent into madness.
I am already halfway there anyway. I didn't remember Mission 014 that I forgot, so I have failed that.
Well I must go now. The post office queue calls.
On another completed unrelated note, I have been slightly disappointed to discover that my workplace is about to ban internet sites not feasibly related to work. I know this means Facebook, so therefore there go my Scrabulous games (which increase my wordpower and creativity, thus my ability to write good copy). Boo. I also suspect that access to blogspot will be restricted, so bye bye lunchtime updates and the positive feeling engendered by embarking on a mission. Boo.
Apparently there has been 'widespread abuse of the internet lately', hence the militant crackdown. But for people like me, who really don't have enough to do every day anyway, and rely on frivolous sites to keep me sane and thus productive, I fear the decision may be the beginning of my descent into madness.
I am already halfway there anyway. I didn't remember Mission 014 that I forgot, so I have failed that.
Well I must go now. The post office queue calls.
Saturday, 22 September 2007
Mission 014 - Memory Blues
I am suffering memory loss. For the life of me I can't remember what mission I was going to write here.
Now I'm trying not to become annoyed at myself for forgetting (in line with my previous mission).
Actually, I suspect this general lack-of-memory is linked to the important essay that I'm trying to produce by next Tuesday. Earlier this year I noticed that I had the same problem about the same time as an exam. It appears that my brain reaches capacity in times of intellectual stress and pushes out all perceived non-essential information (like the name of Keira Knightley, which escaped me earlier today and then came back to me an hour after I was looking for it) to make way for the necessary information (such as how Kant's Critique of Judgement influences literary prize judging). Do not, I repeat (for my own benefit) do not invite me to join your pub quiz team at the moment.
After next Tuesday I expect things will improve, and once again I will remember word for word everything the Buckwell has ever said and done in the past and use it against him in future arguments.
In the meantime, I am going to buy myself some fish oil, or Omega 3 or whatever it's called.
That's not my mission, by the way. My mission is to remember the mission I was going to write here to begin with.
Now I'm trying not to become annoyed at myself for forgetting (in line with my previous mission).
Actually, I suspect this general lack-of-memory is linked to the important essay that I'm trying to produce by next Tuesday. Earlier this year I noticed that I had the same problem about the same time as an exam. It appears that my brain reaches capacity in times of intellectual stress and pushes out all perceived non-essential information (like the name of Keira Knightley, which escaped me earlier today and then came back to me an hour after I was looking for it) to make way for the necessary information (such as how Kant's Critique of Judgement influences literary prize judging). Do not, I repeat (for my own benefit) do not invite me to join your pub quiz team at the moment.
After next Tuesday I expect things will improve, and once again I will remember word for word everything the Buckwell has ever said and done in the past and use it against him in future arguments.
In the meantime, I am going to buy myself some fish oil, or Omega 3 or whatever it's called.
That's not my mission, by the way. My mission is to remember the mission I was going to write here to begin with.
Friday, 21 September 2007
Mission update - legs and stuff
I have failed in my mission to tan my legs. I even went to Africa, and only came back with a slight golden tinge, which lasted all of five days. Even fake tan lasts longer than that! So now I've bought several pairs of opaque black stockings. Maybe it's time to become a goth?
I have also failed in my mission to get to work on time every day for a week. I managed one day. Monday. That was it. My heart wasn't in that one really from the start, so I guess I've learned a good lesson. If you don't REALLY want to achieve your goal, choose another goal. Otherwise it's not going to happen.
I don't really want to be a morning person, so I am perpetuating the 'I am a night person' image, which seems so much more exciting. I like being nocturnal. That is, until I have a job that pays more and offers more exciting work. Then I have a feeling that I might suddenly find 9am doesn't seem so bad...
I have also failed in my mission to get to work on time every day for a week. I managed one day. Monday. That was it. My heart wasn't in that one really from the start, so I guess I've learned a good lesson. If you don't REALLY want to achieve your goal, choose another goal. Otherwise it's not going to happen.
I don't really want to be a morning person, so I am perpetuating the 'I am a night person' image, which seems so much more exciting. I like being nocturnal. That is, until I have a job that pays more and offers more exciting work. Then I have a feeling that I might suddenly find 9am doesn't seem so bad...
Mission 013 - Live life
Live life. Pffffff! I mean, please - exactly what else are you supposed to do with it?
Perhaps this post should actually be entitled 'Enjoy more of life instead of being a grumpy and neurotic person all the time.' But that's a bit long. So I thought I would use one of the inane non-phrases that I so detest to remind me that it's not worth getting worked up about them. Apart from the fact that now I am really bothered by the fact that I've used said crock-of-sh*t phrase. Oh dearie me, this mission is going to be a toughie.
To start with, it's not exactly measurable, like goals are supposed to be. It also depends on many variables:
- my financial state
- the time to my next holiday
- whether I have been doing creative writing or tick-the-box writing
- whether I've eaten
- whether I've slept enough
- whether I have tension in my shoulders
- whether the sun is shining
- whether I have scoffed a packet of M&S white-chocolate-coated strawberries
- whether the bottle of wine is empty or full
And many other non-reasons as well.
Ok. All right. All right! Time to stop being annoyed (and by derivation, annoying). My new mission is to 'Accentuate the Positive', as vocalised so cheerily by Johnny Mercer in the song featured in LA Confidential, and a stylish typography-heavy self-promotion ad by Saatchi and Saatchi NZ that aired in the early 90s. So my first step is to listen to that song every morning on the way to work.
After that, I'm not sure. Perhaps I should try laughing whenever I find myself getting annoyed. So when someone brings me copy changes on something I've written, instead of huffing and frowning and resisting the temptation to let loose with a string of expletives worthy of a severe Tourettes attack, perhaps I should just lean my head back and laugh. Mwahahahahahahahaha!
I wonder how long it would take before I get firmly and politely escorted off the premises?
I think I'd better laugh internally instead, then take 3 deep breaths, smile, and think of cute little kittens.
That's about the best I can come up with now. If you have any suggestions that don't require medication I'd be pleased to hear them. Ok. So here I go, living life!
Perhaps this post should actually be entitled 'Enjoy more of life instead of being a grumpy and neurotic person all the time.' But that's a bit long. So I thought I would use one of the inane non-phrases that I so detest to remind me that it's not worth getting worked up about them. Apart from the fact that now I am really bothered by the fact that I've used said crock-of-sh*t phrase. Oh dearie me, this mission is going to be a toughie.
To start with, it's not exactly measurable, like goals are supposed to be. It also depends on many variables:
- my financial state
- the time to my next holiday
- whether I have been doing creative writing or tick-the-box writing
- whether I've eaten
- whether I've slept enough
- whether I have tension in my shoulders
- whether the sun is shining
- whether I have scoffed a packet of M&S white-chocolate-coated strawberries
- whether the bottle of wine is empty or full
And many other non-reasons as well.
Ok. All right. All right! Time to stop being annoyed (and by derivation, annoying). My new mission is to 'Accentuate the Positive', as vocalised so cheerily by Johnny Mercer in the song featured in LA Confidential, and a stylish typography-heavy self-promotion ad by Saatchi and Saatchi NZ that aired in the early 90s. So my first step is to listen to that song every morning on the way to work.
After that, I'm not sure. Perhaps I should try laughing whenever I find myself getting annoyed. So when someone brings me copy changes on something I've written, instead of huffing and frowning and resisting the temptation to let loose with a string of expletives worthy of a severe Tourettes attack, perhaps I should just lean my head back and laugh. Mwahahahahahahahaha!
I wonder how long it would take before I get firmly and politely escorted off the premises?
I think I'd better laugh internally instead, then take 3 deep breaths, smile, and think of cute little kittens.
That's about the best I can come up with now. If you have any suggestions that don't require medication I'd be pleased to hear them. Ok. So here I go, living life!
Friday, 7 September 2007
Mission 012 - Clocking on
I think we all know that I'm supposed to be writing an essay instead of doing a new post. Well, we do now.
My essay is already late, and here I am procrastinating. I am stupendously talented at procrastination, a talent which I believe is common to many famous writers. Or do I just want to believe that my procrastination makes my success as a writer imminent? Somehow I don't think it works like that.
Anyway, it means that I am late for many things, because I put things off until they absolutely must be done. That goes for almost everything. It even included my own wedding, where I booked the registrar about 3 weeks beforehand, so I had to take the only one available. At the wedding, said registrar sank her glass of Champagne in a flash, then nicked someone else's for a chaser. She was also seen swigging from a hip flask before the ceremony.
What can I say - if I'd chosen earlier I may have gotten someone sober, but I'm sure they would not have provided those cherished comedy moments.
However, not all my procrastination leads to comedy. My morning 'I can't bear to drag myself away from my pillow, I think I'll just give it another 5 minutes,' leads me to be, on average, half an hour late to work every day. (This has been the case for most of my working life.) Of course, I stay there late, and I'm not very productive in the morning anyway (poor excuse, I know), but wouldn't it be nice if I turned up when everyone else does for a change?
So from tomorrow, my new mission is: to be on time for work for at least a week. Oh dear; my heart sank when I wrote those words. It means leaving the house at 7:40am. It really is not my cup of tea, but if I can do that, it's a step towards becoming less of a procrastinator. And then I'll be more on track to finish writing my book.
But first I need to write an essay.
My essay is already late, and here I am procrastinating. I am stupendously talented at procrastination, a talent which I believe is common to many famous writers. Or do I just want to believe that my procrastination makes my success as a writer imminent? Somehow I don't think it works like that.
Anyway, it means that I am late for many things, because I put things off until they absolutely must be done. That goes for almost everything. It even included my own wedding, where I booked the registrar about 3 weeks beforehand, so I had to take the only one available. At the wedding, said registrar sank her glass of Champagne in a flash, then nicked someone else's for a chaser. She was also seen swigging from a hip flask before the ceremony.
What can I say - if I'd chosen earlier I may have gotten someone sober, but I'm sure they would not have provided those cherished comedy moments.
However, not all my procrastination leads to comedy. My morning 'I can't bear to drag myself away from my pillow, I think I'll just give it another 5 minutes,' leads me to be, on average, half an hour late to work every day. (This has been the case for most of my working life.) Of course, I stay there late, and I'm not very productive in the morning anyway (poor excuse, I know), but wouldn't it be nice if I turned up when everyone else does for a change?
So from tomorrow, my new mission is: to be on time for work for at least a week. Oh dear; my heart sank when I wrote those words. It means leaving the house at 7:40am. It really is not my cup of tea, but if I can do that, it's a step towards becoming less of a procrastinator. And then I'll be more on track to finish writing my book.
But first I need to write an essay.
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